“How many successful matches in the past thousand years?”
The Matchmaker lowered his head and replied, “As per your instructions, I’ve been subtly assisting where fate allows. In total, three hundred sixty-two couples have been united.”
The Grand Celestial Master nodded approvingly. “Good. How many new lives have been born?”
“That… you’ll need to check the records in the Underworld. I only handle marriages.”
The Grand Celestial Master chuckled warmly.
Some people have short-lived emotions, so their red strings are also short.
Soon, Grandmaster Xuandu’s gaze was drawn to four clay figurines clustered together. He took two steps forward, observing them closely beneath the “Duxian Sect” label.
Beside him, the Old Man Under the Moon smiled and said, “This is the ‘Three Stars Encircling the Moon’ formation—what great fortune.”
Grandmaster Xuandu nodded slightly, staring at them for a while.
The three clay figurines in flowing dresses with elaborate hairdos surrounded a single figurine in a long robe with long hair. All three female figurines had red strings extending toward the center, but the figurine in the middle…
Hmm…
Grandmaster Xuandu frowned and muttered, “Why is his string so short?”
“This one?”
The Old Man Under the Moon leaned forward slightly, studying the male figurine for a moment before saying,
“Well, it’s short, but it’s still there.
Look, Grandmaster—there are tiny red threads around his wrists and ankles. The red string has only just begun to form…
Some people are just like this. This must be a devoted disciple of the Human Sect, entirely focused on cultivating the Dao, uninterested in worldly affairs.”
“What a waste,” Grandmaster Xuandu chuckled as he looked at the three red strings floating nearby. “Old Man, can you lengthen his red string a bit so it connects with the others?”
“That… is possible, but Grandmaster, we should only assist, not force things…”
“We’re simply helping nature along, giving it a little push.”
“Ah, well… I’ll do it then.”
With that, the Old Man Under the Moon lifted the potted Lovesickness Tree and gently tapped the figurine.
Meanwhile, in the alchemy chamber of Little Qiong Peak in the Eastern Continent, Li Changshou had just finished bathing and was fretting over his new alchemy furnace. Suddenly, his mind was flooded with some rather inappropriate images.
“Hmm?”
Li Changshou chuckled softly and swiftly banished the images from his thoughts.
Back in the Old Man Under the Moon’s hall, as the Lovesickness Tree’s branches made contact, the little clay figurine…
Stepped back.
“Eh?”
The Old Man Under the Moon frowned and tried again, tilting the potted tree slightly before tapping the figurine from another angle.
In the alchemy chamber, Li Changshou’s mind was once again flooded with images—this time a bizarre mix of his past and present lives. His little martial aunt in a sailor uniform, his junior sister in a schoolgirl outfit, and…
Uh, why was he suddenly imagining Youdu wearing a full-body mech suit?
“Steady the Dao heart; illusions must not shake me!”
With a single thought, Li Changshou shattered the images in his mind and shook his head, focusing once again on his alchemy furnace dilemma.
Back in the Old Man Under the Moon’s hall, as the Lovesickness Tree’s branches reached out, the clay figurine twisted slightly to the left.
“Damn it!”
The Old Man Under the Moon’s eyes widened, and he shifted the potted tree again, tapping the figurine one more time. This time, the figurine… did a backflip, nimbly dodging.
“Hahaha!”
Grandmaster Xuandu couldn’t hold back his laughter.
The Old Man Under the Moon’s face darkened. He had embarrassed himself in front of the Grandmaster over such a trivial matter!
“Enough!”
The Old Man Under the Moon stroked the Lovesickness Tree, and it suddenly expanded, its countless branches sweeping toward the figurine like an overwhelming tide.
On Little Qiong Peak, Li Changshou frowned. In his mind, a beautifully crafted alchemy furnace appeared, its lid opening to reveal several alluring figures emerging…
Without hesitation, Li Changshou sat down cross-legged and began reciting a calming incantation.
Come on, was he so easily swayed?
Had he not seen everything in his past life?
Maybe his Dao heart had become unstable after ascending to immortality, leading to these intrusive thoughts.
But momentary pleasure meant nothing.
First, he had to attain longevity—only then could he consider these matters. That was the true path to a carefree life!
Wait, longevity alone wasn’t enough to ensure safety… It was better to avoid getting entangled in unnecessary karmic ties like romance.
Li Changshou took a deep breath and whispered, “Silence.”
In the Old Man Under the Moon’s hall, the clay figurine instantly reacted.
It stepped back…
Dodged…
Flipped…
Sidestepped…
Executed a perfect Thomas spin…
No matter how many branches of the Lovesickness Tree struck at it, not a single leaf landed on its body.
The Old Man Under the Moon was sweating profusely, nearly choking in frustration.
Beside him, Grandmaster Xuandu chuckled. “Let me give you a hand, Old Man.”
With that, his left hand shimmered with starlight, Yin and Yang swirling in his palm as he reached out toward the figurine.
The Old Man Under the Moon’s eyes widened in alarm. Just as he was about to shout, “No, you can’t!” it was already too late—Grandmaster Xuandu had grabbed the figurine’s left arm.
But then…
Crack!
The figurine’s left arm snapped off, and its nimble body leaped away, striking a cheeky pose as if to say, Come at me.
Silence fell over the room.
The Old Man Under the Moon sighed heavily. “Grandmaster… we must not force things…”
“Ahem. Can it be fixed?”
“It can, but it’ll take time. Fortunately, there was no red string on his left arm to begin with, so it won’t be too difficult to repair…”
“Well then, I’ll leave it to you, Old Man.
Ah, right—I’ll drop by again in a while and bring you some pills refined by the Supreme Elder Lord…
And please, keep an eye on this boy. I’m counting on you!”
With that, Grandmaster Xuandu quickly made a Daoist salute, turned, and vanished within two steps, leaving the Old Man Under the Moon standing there in bewilderment.
Meanwhile, back in the alchemy chamber of Duxian Sect…
Li Changshou furrowed his brows, his mind a chaotic mess.
He shook his head in frustration, reached into his storage pouch, and pulled out one of his most effective calming treasures.
A scroll painting.
Opening it, he gazed at the exquisite artwork depicting a row of gorgeously adorned, heavily made-up elderly women…
Li Changshou studied the painting carefully and murmured, “True love isn’t just about admiring her youthful beauty. One must also embrace her nagging when she grows old.”
At that moment, the chaotic images in his mind shattered, and a wave of tranquility washed over him.
“Wait, but in cultivation, does anyone even grow old?”
He chuckled to himself, carefully rolling up the precious Portraits of a Hundred Beauties in Old Age and storing it away, feeling much more at peace.
A real man must be ruthless with himself.
But seriously… it was one thing to imagine his junior sister or little martial aunt.
Why in the world had he imagined Youdu?!
Tsk. Youdu.
Sam Williams On TYMIMA Chapter 152